I am diving in the depths of the ocean inside seeking the truth behind the curtains of pain. Creating space to soar up high in the sky and experience the joy and play of existence. I am starting to overflow and am longing for a space to share, connect and inspire others to join this divine journey towards the love we already are.
I started this blog a bit over a year ago, not knowing what would come out of it or exactly what my intention was. I did know that I had a big need to become visible. To share parts of myself that were well hidden and to allow myself to be vulnerable when bringing these things into the light. I feel like this has been a space where I have been able to do that and that makes me feel really happy and grateful.
Thank you so much for reading what I have shared here and for receiving me in my vulnerability. I hope I have been able to plant a few seeds in you as well, maybe even inspired someone to dare to show up in vulnerability too.
With that said, with a lot of excitement and curiosity about what is to come, I close this chapter and get ready to start a new one.
She is a blonde girl full of energy. She is full of excitement and curiosity. She likes to investigate things and to understand how things work. She has a caring and nurturing nature. She likes to be outside and in nature.
She likes the colors pink, purple, blue and green. She is very strong. She has a lot of energy that she likes to express through movement. She radiates love, light and innocence. She has the ability to light up a room.
She is content with just being by her self. She loves to just be silent and watch things. She is fascinated with the world and appreciates beauty.
She is very sensitive. She is connected with oneness and unconditional love. She is meditative. She is full of compassion. She likes to dance and has the ability to completely let go and be total. She is very attentive, receptive and open to her surroundings. She is sensual and playful.
She is determined, clear, strong and has the ability to forgive and persevere.
She is creative and she likes to express herself with colors. She is grounded and connected to nature. She likes trees. She has the ability to give and receive. She enjoys herself and she is present in life. She is intelligent and has the ability to understand the world around her.
She is full of love and she likes to share it. She has a sense of humor and she likes to laugh.
When something hurts we have a choice. To hide, suppress and avoid or we can choose to evolve. To sit down and feel it. What is it and why am I so scared of feeling it?
I am starting to see that nothing is as scary as hiding from ourselves. When we hide from ourselves our home becomes a scary place, hostile and unsafe. Our body becomes our enemy and a split occurs. We need to step away from our body in order to stay safe. Our body mirrors us, it shows us what we feel and brings us back to our truth.
So when we split from our body we are free in a sense. Free from seeing what is actually there. But we are also cut off from our source. Cut off from the love, light and play that we are. We enter the world of the mind and life becomes flat. We need distractions and to constantly be stimulated in order to feel okay and stay blind to the fact that we are missing the essential qualities of life. It is scary.
The only way out is to choose to wake up, choose to open our eyes and see what is there. Sitting and feeling an uncomfortable feeling arising within, the choice to face it does not seem as scary anymore. Little by little we can face our fears. Each time seeing that we come out on the other side. Each time we have created more space for us to be. More space to breathe and love and dance.
These fears keep us boxed in, they keep us from seeing that we are capable of doing whatever we want. All is possible. These fears keep us small, they keep us obedient and chained in to the rules of society.
I am facing my fears everyday, each time choosing to stay, breathe and feel. I am starting to break out of the chains that have been holding me down. I am seeing that I have wings and I am learning how to fly. I am seeing that the world is available to me and that anything is possible. No one can stop me or hold me back besides myself.
As I write these poems I transform with every word coming through. There is a wisdom within all of us and I am finding it within me. An unlimited source of love and creative energy. Slowly slowly I am starting to trust myself and trust where I am guided. I wanted to find the answers outside, I wanted someone to give me a map and show me the way. I was scared of making mistakes. Learning by doing and allowing, I see that there are no mistakes. When the longing for ourselves surfaces it starts to guide us. Navigating us through life. Creating spaces and situations where we face what needs to be seen and healed. As trust arrises it becomes a dance, knowing that nothing lasts forever. With every wave of anguish space is created for even more joy and love. Empowered by knowing we have everything we need inside we are free. There are no longer rules to follow, no need so seek approval or to ask for permission. You are your own master and life becomes a play. The possibilities are infinite and the world is at your feet. Close your eyes and take a breath and everything you have been searching for you will find inside. I am not saying it is easy, we have been closed for so long conditioned not to love and trust ourselves. It is painful but on the other side of the pain is everything you have ever wanted.
Leaving all behind Dying to what I was Burning everything and rising from the ashes
I am stepping out of myself Leaving my body behind Standing at an open gate Not knowing what is to come
Walking through the fires of pain There is no time to hide anymore Screaming and turning, wanting it to end
There is no space to hide behind pain anymore There is a place for me on the other side and I am ready to take it Ready to step up and take my place in the light
My gifts are needed and it is time Not feeling ready wanting to hide It is okay my dear there is still a little bit of time
Knowing I can hold myself and take responsibility for what is mine
What should I do? What should I do? And I surrender
Tossing and turning Shifting and evolving
This is it my dear you are here
Complete surrender there is no need to fight Utter surrender and you will see the light
Healing is happening frequency is rising Entering into a new chapter starting on a blank page It is not a doing anymore but a happening
Open and receiving as the universe works through me Leaving doubt behind and trusting in life
A beautiful unfolding A dance a play a song A flower opening its wings allowing love to flow in
My heart beating and warmth spreading in my body
Slowly coming back but I come back as something new The innocence of a child
In a new world seeing the world for the first time Held by the earth and the mother within Stroked and embraced welcomed into this world
Loved by existence and held from within There is nothing to do all is okay.